Sunday, June 16, 2013

Some "Marriages-Relationships-Aftermath -- Blah! Blah!" crap. 



 The fable of a multitude of so called modern relationships is a variation on a common theme: the conspiracy between men and women to murder the Powerful. Usually when we think of power, or two married souls ponder over it or even more when just two opposite sexes get pensive about the power of power.-they think of external powers, and of powerful people who have institutionalized “marriage” in the world. And being victimized by this powerful notion I used to think I needed a powerful man, someone who could protect me from the harshness and evils of the dirty world. What I've cum to realize is that evils of the ugly world that confront me every now and then-mostly when I’m all by myself-are a reflection of my own dilemma, my internal state, my mind. The powerful man I was looking for would be primarily, someone who supported me in keeping me on track spiritually and help me maintain clarity within me that life would pose fewer problems.

I no longer yearn for a husband who would say to me, “Don’t worry, honey. If they are mean to you, I’ll beat them up or buy them out”. Instead my only heart pines for a life partner who prays with me regularly so that fewer monsters from the outer world disturb me, and who, when they do, guides me to look within my own consciousness for answers to combat false patriarchal power.


And I believe this is what every girl and the woman in her desires in her perspective of the institution of marriage. Both men and women at some point in time do incline to marry. But how much of their desire is natural and how much of it is cultural is still remains a million dollar question. What is certainly natural is our desire for the beloved. What is cultural is our tendency to forget that a piece of paper cannot tie hearts together. The issue is not whether we marry but whether we allow any choice of lifestyle to impinge on their ability to fly.


I once heard someone say that women, married ones in particular can’t write for nuts. I don’t believe this is true, but I understand what it means. The crux of the matter is marriage is not a mere convention but it is often looked as one and, as such, will sink instead of uplifting a woman’s spirit.

Today, with the advent of technology and various social networking boards, I see relationships losing their sanctity. It’s all in the open, and it’s mostly more of open ones. Trust is ever losing. Like all other things, people flaunt break-ups and separation more prominently than engagements. One cheating on the other is a clichéd story. And the impact of these sites is so much that a girl literally ended her life reading her husband’s latest status about their ‘’spiltsville’!!!    

Huh! Is that all we value relationships for??? I’m afraid if our relationships agree to this in the affirmative!!!

Let technology serve our love for one another. And not for our mutual destruction. Let intelligence lead us to peace and not to war; to commitment that involves complete surrender. Let our actions be used to heal and not to further wound.

Being in a relationship means much more than fighting, cheating, doubting, and then separating! And as women we must keep this message alive. We must understand its importance and relay it to others. Whispering it in the dark and shouting it in the light of the day.
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Yeaaaah! I’m done. That’s it!





19 comments:

  1. Very difficult to comprehend, though I got the crux of it. The author is very literate and perhaps the adrenaline is high and beating in her blood at the very end.

    I think until and unless there is love from both sides, a relation will just be dragging on or soon will get broken. So first of all, the parties need to fine tune their frequencies so that love exists and is not merely infatuation. Love+infatuation+marriage => long lasting relationship

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    1. Ha Ha! Good you got the drift. And yes you're right. A relationship, and esp marriage, needs a lot of nurturing. And from both the partners. Else, it only brings in a a sense of dragging!

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  2. Reading this really surrounded my mind with different thoughts on how Men and Women Judge their partner, and demands their dominance, for not to be secure, but to prove their Logics may be true.

    I have seen where best relationship goes bitter and in trouble, is either due to misunderstandings or any expectations not been met.

    As per me relationships should not be measurable or calculative.
    It should be pure, visible and transparent.
    Men and women should learn how to respect the differences among each other.

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  3. Very nicely written ! well thought out...keep writing :)

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  4. Hello didi...i'm sorry i was busy with job n all...ye wala apne sahi main bahut accha likha hai :)i am so much inspired by you di :) thanku

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    1. Hi P. Good to see comment. Thanks and keep reading :-)

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  5. very lovely article nooreen.i got so many words to learn from here.your english is very good

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    1. Ha ha :-) My articles are serving for a vocab portal for you!!! I'm happy :-) Thanks so much

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  6. hello didi...this is an awesome and fantastic article...please write more i will read it

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    1. Thanks Vivek. There's lot more to come. Stay tuned!

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  7. Wow ! awesome article didi....you have very good english...i like it

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  8. Zabardast english hai aapki didi....mujhe to ek baar mai samajh bhi nahin aya...but really very nice article on relationship...we need to learn from this...i am akash,younger brother of abhishek singh

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  9. Anshuman SharmaSunday, 23 June, 2013

    Aah ! there you go :) You seem to be a relationships-person,means you handle them well :) Kudos to you writing.Keep them coming.

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  10. HA HA!!! YES, I'AM. Thanks for the good words! :-)

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  11. di , very well written !!
    Appropriate words have been used to convey the view point..
    "Being in a relationship means much more than fighting, cheating, doubting, and then separating! " , this line won my heart <3...
    Reading this blog , I fell in love with your writing style !
    It seems a true ICSE writing !! :P

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